Not Quite You (A Collage Of Lovers):
Why is it that dates and music are so closely linked to memories of people? That colors and animals will always remind me of you. Just a number of a day in a month in a year. If I keep dating I won’t be able to look at a calendar. The same pang comes from music. Not being able to listen to certain songs, or bands. The memories that surface when I do. I remember dancing to… in your house, with my skirt swishing and your arms around me, when we were happy. Way back then…
I never knew colors and animals could be so intimately connected to people. Green. I see it and think of you. And turtles. Why on earth can’t I see one and not think of you? Ships, birds, and compasses remind me of another. Candles and soft music make me think of you too.
I remember you bathed in sunlight streaming through the windows, and nights with candlelight moving softly against your skin. Our breathing mixed and bodies warm from each other. If you were here I’d hold you close.
What is it about winter that makes a body itch for another? It’s not you, or you, but maybe you will do. I miss you like crazy, or was it your warm body? I can’t help but miss you.
The eyes always get me. Smoldering blue. My heart pounds just thinking of them. Icy green ones float in my memory, unattached to a face. Brown, that light up and turn honey-colored in the sun. I can see flecks of color you’ve got hidden there. And warm, hazel eyes like mine. I could stare into them for hours and do nothing but smile. My face is starting to get sore. I’m a sucker for eyes. And noses, and lips. A goofy, beak-like nose I can’t help but nibble. Rounded noses I can’t help but touch. Cheekbones to hold and lips to kiss. A sexy back to run my nails down, and a muscled body to explore with my fingertips. Chest hair to rub my cheek against. Add strong arms to enfold me and hands to hold me and we’re set.
I wish you were here, but my version of you. The way you were in the beginning when you were mine. Maybe I haven’t found you yet and I’ll keep looking, or I’ll pause since love comes when you least expect it.