glass walls

Think of the girls living inside of glass walls,
Who have no privacy,
Who are watched from the halls
Some may live there for many years,
Their mirror images, their only fears

Come on girls, now take my hands
Let’s spin in circles
And dance in the sand
Why have we let things get so far?
Trapped inside of the walls you are?
One day, may you all break free
And realize everyone has beauty

We see you,
The girl who stands in front of the mirror and says:
“I’m too fat”
Your ribs are bulging,
Your face is taunt,
What happened to those curves you used to flaunt?

Come on girls, now take my hands,
Let’s spin in circles,
And dance in the sand

There are people who care about you,
Who worry about the things you do,
Remove the tubes,
Replace the glass,
Don’t waste away, or you won’t last

So if I may,
Take the time to say,
“You’re beautiful,
inside and out.”
________________________________

It’s corny and an oldie but the message is what matters. I had heard a story of someone I used to know who was sent to a rehab center for being anorexic and bulimic. I was heartbroken at the idea of girls (and guys) with eating disorders being sent to a place where they’re watched behind glass walls. I think it’s sad and interesting that even if a person is skinny or a normal weight for their body they will see themselves as fat or unfit. The mirror sees one thing but they don’t believe it because they’re seeing another.

I think a large part of it is because of how the media portrays what the ideal person should look: flawless, while the truth is: they have been photoshopped. It’s been said so many times but beauty is in the eye of the eye of the beholder, and there is no specific definition.

I really wish that I could do more for these people. I at least hope that my posts have an affect on my readers. Again, comments about people’s bodies even if they’re joking might hit home. You may not know what they’re going through and how deeply your comments affect them.

© Copyright-All rights reserved- Hannah Farmery

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a secret you don’t have to keep

And for some people,
There’s hurt.
Like dark secrets that weigh down on you,
Many people you want to tell them to
I share in this world of secrets and pain
Yet I chose not to remain.
Don’t ever say, you don’t have a choice
For you have every choice to use your voice.

Like many, I’ve been dealt cruelties and secrets
Which I think about telling but have kept.
Yet I thrived during all of these years,
Though I’ve shed unwelcome tears.

And for some,
There’s hurt.
The many secrets that try to weigh you down.

-Hannah Farmery

Quiet towns

The train keeps moving
Past quiet towns
The silence disrupted by
the clanking of metal
and the blare of the horn

Little sailboats patiently wait
Geese sit in a row
A house peaks out between the trees
Graffitied box cars
Long abandoned castle ruins,
hollow with age.

Lily pads, an island of green
Water glistens
Trees stand tall
The sailboats and people in parks
come out to play

Big, fluffy clouds
suspended in the sky,
Old bridges and water towers
The mountains a continuous,
calming presence
Gentle green curves,
Occasionally a pale blue,
shade lighter than the sky.

I long to stop the train
To explore where trees grow tall
and deers run freely
I’d prove nymphs exist by becoming one
I wish to explore castle ruins,
Little cottages on the hill and
quiet towns
To board sailboats
and climb water towers
Visiting places I’ve never been.

But the rumble of the train
A constant motion beneath my feet
stays on its course
to deliver me home.

© Copyright-All rights reserved-Hannah Farmery

a confession

I said it. I love you.
An exhale of breath
I’ve been holding after a long inhale.
I can feel my ribs settling in place again,
now that you know.

I love you. I love you so much.

We stood in the dark,
A light shining overhead
Illuminating you.
I had cut you off
You were speaking passionately
about something
And I couldn’t hold it any longer
That release after a long breath

I had taken you by surprise,
You didn’t know I felt that way
It felt natural,
It felt right,
Like I had said it before
Which I had,
Years ago

When we were lovers
And together.
The years have gone by
And we’ve changed,
Matured.
We used to fight all the time
And I’d be ready for it.

The dust has settled now
I feel a sense of calm when
I talk to you.
It’s only right that I’ve held on,
I’ve kept wanting you.

My eyelids flutter open,
I’m puzzled by the clarity
Of my dream
So sure of my thoughts
And desires,
The love for someone
I talk to every day
Since when I’m awake
I don’t know if I want you
Because you’re there
and I need someone to love
Or if I’ve never stopped loving you.

© Copyright-All rights reserved-Hannah Farmery